Losing A Loved One

About three months ago, I suffered a tremendous loss - the death of my beloved mother. The days following her passing were arduously long and involved. I realized that sometimes, a single word can define an entire situation. During this time, that word for me was "aftermath." I was in the dense aftermath of an explosion which left tattered remnants of people's lives - one of which was my own - in its wake. For some time, I walked amidst grief's suffocating, gloomy overcast. So inescapable was this murk that I finally understood what it meant to "walk through the valley of the shadow of death" (Psalm 23:4 KJV). Looking back, I realize that I was not at all functional; that the things I helped accomplish only transpired as God carried me through this time period. Reading the scriptures and whispering constant, half-formed prayers were the only things I had either the will or energy to accomplish.

Scripture speaks clearly of these moments:

• ...the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. -Romans 8:26-27 NIV

Though I immediately began to see God's hand at work in this tragedy, each new day gives the event new perspective. Many of my mother's works have been brought to light since her passing, clearly illustrating the love of God which she carried within her heart as she walked through life. I am thankful that her transition away from this world was mercifully swift and painless; and I am infinitely relieved that she was spared from the slow, torturous demise which her failing health and my occupational awareness told me she would probably succumb to.

Jesus once said, "he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live" (John 11:25 KJV). I know my mother believed in Christ and loved him dearly, therefore I know she lives on. Furthermore, Paul the apostle once reminded us that when we are "away from the body," we are "at home with the Lord" (2 Cor 5:8 NIV). Thus, I don't mourn for her, but I celebrate her return home from a world whose hardships I've become so familiar with. I do, however, suffer from the physical void which her loss has left within me; and it is this void which brought gloom to my world.

My loss had left me feeling incomplete. It was as if one of my body parts had been amputated. I could still feel the site where the limb used to be, but could no longer access it - yet it's phantom pain remained palpably real. However, as I am still alive, I now realize that - just as one who has lost a limb - I must learn to carry on even though part of me is missing. I must adapt to the effects which this change has exerted upon my life. Though I had begun to wonder if void's shadow would ever be lifted - if light would ever again return to that excised piece of my heart - I have seen brightness begin to return. I have experienced moments not tainted by despair's oily murk. I have begun to smile again. Though I realize I will always miss mom, I take comfort in knowing that I will see her again someday. But for now, there is work to do...because, as mom well knew, "the harvest is plentiful but the workers are few" (Matthew 9:37 NIV).

"It is written"

The Bible tells us that Jesus Christ was tempted by and resisted the devil on three separate occasions (Matt. 4 NIV). Let us ensure that we identify exactly what was transpiring in these few verses of scripture: the son of God - the "Lord of Lords" - was waging war with the most dangerous force of evil in the universe! Yet, it is the manner in which Jesus resisted evil which is a critical lesson to us. One would think that three paramount battles such as these would be fought on a grand scale, utilizing great armies and even greater weapons. Yet, Jesus opted not to summon the "legions of angels" which we know were at his disposal (Matt. 26:53 NIV). According to the Apostle Matthew, in all three instances of temptation, Jesus began his response with the words, "It is written" - revealing to us one of the most important weapons we, as Christians, have in our repertoire: the written word of God.

It seems ludicrous for a warrior to walk onto a battlefield without necessary equipment. What chances would a medieval knight have had in battle without armor, a sword, and a shield? But, day after day, many Christians set out on their God-ordained missions unarmed for the conflicts which lie in wait for them. Let us not fool ourselves; each day we remain on Earth, we do battle with forces which attempt to destroy us; and every sunrise we witness is a sign that God has not yet called us home from our earthly missions. In other words, the Christian is a soldier of God who has been deployed to the battlefront. It is with this vision that the Apostle Paul described the tactical gear of the Christian infantryman (Eph. 6:14-17 NIV):

• Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

This said, is it any wonder that battles are lost? How can we expect victory in this struggle - what Paul referred to as "the good fight of the faith" (1 Tim. 6:12) - when we are ill-equipped for the missions at hand? What warrior in their right mind rides into battle with poorly kept armor and weapons - or, worse yet, no equipment whatsoever? King David described the blessed as those who delight in God's law and meditate on it "day and night" - even warning us that not doing so renders us as "chaff that the wind blows away" (Psalm 1:1-4 NIV).

Let us, therefore, be strong in the word of God - our most precious weapon in this difficult battle which is earthly life. Let us follow the example of Jesus and resist evil through knowledge of the scriptures - not relying on our own vulnerable human strength but on the power of He who is almighty.